I would like to speak to the person who coined the old saying, "friends make the best lovers" lol. I know that I have male friends, and they are my "friends" for a reason...I just dont see them in that light. And I know this goes vice versa as well. Ive had male friends who I might have looked at as more than a friend, but I still found them keeping me in the friend zone, lol, which is quite alright because I wouldnt want to be with someone who didnt see me in the same light as I saw them. So when do friends stop looking at each other as such and start seeing something more? How does this come about? Im just curious thats all....
I know couples who proclaim that their other half is their best friend, but Im sure that happened as the relationship developed (even though thats a whole other topic, dont get me started, lol). But if you've known someone for a while...you've hung out with them, they know some of your inner most secrets, and their one of the closest people you have in your life, how do you all of a sudden turn off the friendship switch and turn on the sex switch? Im sure that developing a love relationship with someone who you consider a good friend must be wonderful. But as I sit and think about the true male friends that I have....I dont think that I could ever view them in that light. Now granted, they are all attractive, good men, who have something going for them in way or another, but I dont ever see myself as looking at them as any more than that. And as a female friend of mine just said (Karla Barla:), "wouldnt it have happened already if it were to happen"? How can friends make the best lovers when some people dont even believe that men and woman can be JUST friends in the first place??...
...any thoughts out there?
~J. Genese
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I'm not sure where you want me to post...here or FB notes... & how come nobody else is on these boards...you guys have good topics.
ReplyDeleteAnyhow.. It seems to me that there are diff kinds of chemistry between people. Sometime u just have an open & warm & friendly trusting enrgy that u pass back and forth between you and another person....minus the romantic attraction. Other times you have all of the above. It seems like sexual chemistry & how open a person is to being involved romantically is the x-factor.
Sometimes a man or a woman is physically/sexaully attracted to another person right away. & as you come to know that individual u become friends...meaning, u develop that trust, warmth ,respect etc. I mean relationships are all about intimacy anyway. So it would seem that a strong friendship bond along w/ strong sexual attaction is ideal.
If a person is ur friend & that's the limit to your comfort zone as for as that relationship goes then that's what it is & so be it. I do think sometimes that romantic attraction can sneak up & grow over time & surprise a person/people, having not been there in the past. But again, I guess it's all about whut you want & are open to exploring.
Plus we all seem to have tiers of friendships anyway...we have specialists for all diff areas of our lives...So people are used to having people in their lives for various reasons.
jafar.